A 32-year-old software engineer buys her first condo in Brooklyn. She has no spouse and no children. Does she need a will? Most people in her position assume the answer is no. They believe estate planning is for the wealthy or the retired—something to consider decades from now.
This is one of the most persistent and damaging misconceptions I encounter in my practice. The question isn’t at what age you should plan; it’s at what point your life requires it. For nearly every adult, that point is now. Estate planning is not about how much you have. It’s about who you want to protect and what you want to control. Without a plan, you are leaving those decisions to a court.
Life Events, Not Age, Are the True Catalyst
Clients often ask me for a magic number—an age when estate planning becomes necessary. But there is no magic number. Instead, there are inflection points, moments in life when your responsibilities shift and your assets change. These are the real triggers for creating a deliberate plan.
The first trigger is simply turning 18. At that moment, you become a legal adult. Your parents can no longer automatically make medical decisions or access financial information for you. If you were in an accident, a doctor couldn’t legally speak to them without your written permission. This is why every young adult should have, at a minimum, a Health Care Proxy and a Durable Power of Attorney. These documents designate who you trust to act on your behalf if you cannot—a crucial contingency for any adult.
The next catalysts are often financial. You start a business. You buy a home. You open a retirement account. That Brooklyn condo, for instance, is a significant asset. Who should inherit it? Who will manage the mortgage payments and co-op fees if you are incapacitated? These are not questions for your 60s. They are immediate questions the moment your name is on the deed.
Finally, and most profoundly, are family changes. Marriage creates a new legal next-of-kin. The birth of a child brings the profound responsibility of naming a guardian—the person who would raise your child if you and your spouse were gone. This is perhaps the single most important decision any parent can make in an estate plan. Leaving it to chance is unthinkable, yet many do.
What Happens Without a Plan? New York’s Default
If you don’t create a plan, the State of New York has one for you. It’s called the law of intestacy, and it rarely aligns with a person’s true wishes.
Under New York’s Estates, Powers and Trusts Law § 4-1.1, the state dictates who inherits your property through a rigid, predetermined formula. The law follows bloodlines. For our 32-year-old condo owner, if she dies without a will, her assets go directly to her parents. If her parents are no longer living, her assets go to her siblings.
What if she had a partner of ten years to whom she wanted to leave the condo? Under the statute, that partner has no inheritance rights. What if she was estranged from her family but close with a cousin or a dear friend? The law makes no exceptions for relationships outside of blood or marriage. Your intentions are irrelevant.
The process itself is administered through the Surrogate’s Court. It is public, often slow, and can be expensive. A court-appointed administrator will be put in charge of your assets, and your loved ones must wait as the legal process unfolds. This is the opposite of a deliberate legacy. It is a legacy by default.
Planning for Incapacity Is Stewardship
While a will directs what happens after you die, other documents are essential for managing your affairs if you become incapacitated during your lifetime. This is a part of stewardship that is too often overlooked.
A Durable Power of Attorney allows you to appoint a trusted agent to handle your financial matters—pay your bills, manage your investments, file your taxes—if you are unable to do so yourself. Without this document, your family would have to petition a court to have a guardian appointed, a proceeding that can be costly, emotionally draining, and time-consuming.
A Health Care Proxy lets you name an agent to make medical decisions on your behalf, based on your expressed wishes. Paired with a Living Will, which outlines your preferences for end-of-life care, it provides clear guidance to your family and physicians during a moment of crisis. It ensures your voice is heard when you cannot speak for yourself.
These are not documents for old age. They are for anyone who wants to prevent a sudden illness or accident from throwing their family into legal and financial chaos. Stewardship.
Thinking about these contingencies isn’t morbid; it’s prudent. It is an act of responsibility to yourself and to the people you care about. The right time to plan is when you have something to protect and someone to protect. For most of us, that time arrived long ago.
The most practical first step is to simply inventory your assets and identify your key relationships. To help you organize your thoughts, our firm can provide a confidential personal inventory worksheet. Reviewing this document is often the first step toward building a plan that truly reflects your intentions.
